Like many other young girls, I suffered from poor body image very early on in life. There were always advertisements or commercials on the television, telling me that in order to be desirable, liked, or sought after you needed to shrink yourself and take up less space.
I started dieting when I was ten years old. And every single diet I tried failed. Never for a
second did I consider that the problem was with the diets and not with me. I blamed myself
for every failed diet, thinking that I was simply not motivated or disciplined enough. It hadn’t
crossed my mind that diets don’t need to fulfill their promises. I hadn’t realized, at the age of
ten, that this was a billion dollar industry that left people more miserable with their bodies
compared to when they had started dieting.
I continued to move from diet to diet, and I never found the happiness I was seeking. I was
never thin enough or good enough, and I could always find something else that I wanted to
change about myself. I ended up developing three (!) different eating disorders over the span
of ten years.
After I had lost my period for a couple of months, I had visited a doctor who gave me one of
the biggest wakeup calls of my life: if I didn’t change my habits, there was a possibility that I
wouldn’t be able to fall pregnant in the future. It was always my greatest dream to become a
mother and the fact that I could be permanently damaging my body snapped the blinders
straight off.
I sought out recovery right away. It was a lonely and isolating journey for me. I did not have
the best support system at the time and also tried to keep my recovery to myself because I
was ashamed. I remember how isolated I felt which is why I decided to share my journey on
social media, through Instagram (clickable link) and YouTube (clickable link). Slowly,
thousands of people began to follow along my journey. They began to get comfortable with
me as well and share their own stories. Soon, they were letting me know that it was because
of me that they have improved their relationship with their bodies and food, or how they are
now going to therapy because of me.
At the beginning of 2020 I was contracted to work an office job for just over a year. I
contemplated for a long while about what I wanted to do afterwards. I didn’t like working in
an office and the work wasn’t meaningful to me. From there, I received the encouragement
of those who follow me on social media to pursue recovery coaching.
Now, I am a Certified Eating Disorder Coach (Eating Disorder Intuitive Therapy Program
[EDIT]) which is developed and presented by Dr. Dorie McCubbrey (MSEd, PhD, LPS,
CEDS). Though I am not a substitute for professional medical treatment, I can work with you
alongside a treatment team or independently depending on the support you are looking for.
And I said to my body. Softly. ‘I want to be your friend.’ It took a long breath and replied, ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this.
The real difficulty is to overcome how you think about yourself.
Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny.
Expose yourself to your deepest fear; after that, fear has no power.
I provide individualized one-on-one recovery coaching anywhere in the world via Zoom for anyone 18 years and older struggling with disordered eating, self love, or those who want to learn how to listen to their body by using intuitive eating.
